17. Nebelung

[heisrisen]

[Private to Sylvanas]

You mentioned an exchange.



[Private to Davy Jones]

Do you consider yourself Lady Windrunner's friend?



[Spam for Iris.]

[He can, when occasion calls for it, be very, very sneaky. Not strictly breathing helps. When she wakes the day after her return, she finds a worn abalone button - one of Yavru's inexplicable treasures - on her bedside table and a note on her chart about the effects of bloodloss on a bicardial system.]

Eat iron & hydrate!

[Beyond that, he makes himself scarce. He's still not back on his regular shifts in the infirmary, and he doesn't go to the lab, or the greenhouse, or make himself otherwise publicly available. If she tries his room, there are good odds he's hiding out in Morgana's room, or Sylvanas's, or in the most secluded recesses of the library.]



[Private to Hornblower]

...among other things, Captain Bush has mentioned you excel in mathematics.



[Private to Hannibal]

If we were planting a few herbs, would you have requests?

Comments

[Private]

[tentacruelest]

[Oh what the goddamn hell is this nonsense. Jones growls over the line]

Emperor, I willnae discuss my private business with you.

[Private]

[heisrisen]

Of course not. You can shut up and listen, then.

She is in pain, Captain, as much as I have seen her in during my time here. If you are so self-centered as to imagine that she neglects you for anything less than her own prolonged emotional disintegration - well, frankly, she deserves better.

[Private]

[tentacruelest]

[Angry sputtering on the other end of the line. Jones needs a few seconds to compose himself, slamming his claw down angrily]

She does not neglect me. And she is better off alone! We are all of us better off alone! You will not involve yourself in our affairs, upstart!

[Private]

[heisrisen]

I will gladly claim to be her friend, no matter who asks it, and that makes it my affair.

We will all suffer, one way or another. If you intend to knowingly turn your face away, that is, indeed, your business. Simply understand that she is not choosing to do the same.

[Private]

[tentacruelest]

[Angry stewing. Angry stewing. Jones is about to lash out again when something the Emperor said previously finally catches up with him]

You said she was in pain.

[Private]

[heisrisen]

[Not so curt, now. Not gentle, either. Just solemn.]

Yes.

Private

[sssiiiiirrrrr]

I do... enjoy mathematics, but I am beginning to wonder if Captain Bush hasn't been a little overly generous with his descriptions of me.

Private

[heisrisen]

It's just - you probably saw, but no doubt the ramifications remain strange to you. We have a number of teenagers aboard, inmates and wardens alike, and there are constant attempts to maintain decent schooling for them here, so they can better themselves.

Ms. Lynd, who was our resident math instructor, announced her departure just yesterday.

Private

[sssiiiiirrrrr]

Oh.

That's extremely wise, actually. Some captains have done similar things for the young midshipmen on board ships I've served in the past.

Of course, I would be happy to volunteer, if there is no one more suitable on board.

Private

[heisrisen]

Several of us are capable with the material, but we already have work shifts - as do some of the children, in fact - and the scheduling rapidly becomes catastrophic.

You should put your name in, at least. We believe Mister Megamind is organizing the arrangements.

[Private]

[forsaken_queen]

I did.

[Private]

[heisrisen]

We'd rather discuss it in person. May we come see you?

[Private]

[forsaken_queen]

Of course.

[Private]

[heisrisen]

I'll be there soon.

[And he is, rapping lightly.]

[Spam]

[forsaken_queen]

[There's an excited meow and pawing, beforethe door is opened. Lirath immediately starts purring like a motorcycle, rubbing against the Emperor's legs. It's you again! So happy to see you! c:

His mistress is much cooler in her greeting, giving a slight nod of her head, then stepping back to let him inside. ]

[Spam]

[heisrisen]

[He rubs Lirath's ears indulgently, and closes the door behind him.]

Is it predominantly death you're after, or the pain?

[Or both.]

[text/much later spam]

[routemistress]

[no words, only a snapshot of a huge, half-eaten plateful of oysters and a mostly finished pint of Guinness.]

[spam]

[Normally she can count on running into the Emperor somewhere or other, but this time almost a week goes by without it happening naturally, and so Iris decides to take steps.

She considers stealing borrowing Barbara's warden item, but reluctantly doesn't; it's too much of a violation, she thinks, both of the Emperor's and Barbara's trust in her and in the Barge institution of warden/inmate relations.

So instead she sets her dogs to track him. It's tricky work, with his faint unliving scent, but he also smells of two very specific cats and after a few false starts, the two German Shepherds appear in the library. Elvis comes and sits on his feet, tongue lolling in cheerful canine triumph, and Solace lays himself down meditatively across the doorway.]

[heisrisen]

[He bristles and sulks, pulling his feet away and tucking them under himself, instead.]

Are you even allowed in here?

[Nevermind that the librarian is a dragon.]

[routemistress]

[Elvis only grins. Iris steps into the room over Solace, who leaps up behind her at the perfect moment not to trip her, and both dogs crowd around her to be given dried meat sticks for their success.]

They're like me, lovey, no one keeps us out for long. I were away six months and I'd like a hug now.

[That totally qualifies as asking permission, and she comes to squeeze his shoulders. She knows something is wrong; he avoided her. She doesn't know what. Hugging doesn't solve everything, but Iris always likes it as a first step.]

[heisrisen]

[He doesn't flinch - he doesn't show fear, he never has. And it's not fear, precisely - not emotional fear, not the visceral kind. But he doesn't want this to happen, and he doesn't know how to get out of it without having to explain himself, which would be nearly as bad. He glares at her - rough but not really venomous - and hunches in on himself, delaying and bracing himself without quite pulling away. He doesn't want his insides exposed right now, least of all to her, for reasons he feels the pressure of but has been unwilling to investigate further. He doesn't go blank with deliberate meditation, the way he used to with Bianca, but he shuffles and bristles and hides less effectively, tries to sublimate all his aching tumult into his current irritation.]

[routemistress]

[It's a shock, a visceral kick of rejected hurt; Iris herself steps away, plasters it over quickly, but Solace yips and both dogs flatten their ears and cringe as though someone had aimed a kick at them. Iris says nothing for a few moments while she soothes them, and then she sits on the edge of the table, outside easy touching distance.]

Fine. What'd I do now?

[heisrisen]

[There's guilt in his eyes, immediately, though he swallows and blinks it away. Another reason, maybe, he'd been so unwilling to say no out loud and outright. He doesn't want to think about that, either. He hasn't felt guilty for much in a very long time.]

Nothing.

[The tiniest bit sulky. But it's true, that he isn't mad at her at all. He just doesn't like the state of himself, and he doesn't want her to see.]

[Private]

[youwill]

How kind of you to ask. I could think of several that would be excellent in a garden. [One used primarily for cooking.]

[Private]

[heisrisen]

We suspected you might.

Although we do have a favor to ask.

[Reciprocally. Obviously.]

[Private]

[youwill]

If it is in my ability, I will be happy to grant it.

[Maybe.]